THE PLANT

 

 blog photo 23 white flower (2).jpgWHAT IT IS

The deputy-premier of the small Caribbean island Nevis, was widely ridiculed in parliament for his explanation of why this small country did so well in the first Canine Olympics held in Salt Lake City, Utah.

The deputy-premier claims he witnessed an Unidentified Flying Object take off in the early morning hours and when he went to investigate the phenomenon a circular pattern in the soil containing the above pictured plants is all that remained.

He further explained that the island’s dogs ravenously ate the flowers and became ‘superdogs’, thus allowing them to take home 21 gold, 15 silver and 12 bronze medals.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

After several strange instances involving confrontations between citizens and the insect world, a joint task force between the Royal Canadian Mounted Police and  the Federal Bureau of Investigation have been formed.

Although officials from both agencies believe there is no grounds for concern, the task force has discovered what they suggest is an insect ‘flag’ of some kind. This banner depicts a flower that the world’s leading botanist have not been able to identify. Additionally, the word ENTOMOLOGY is displayed along the bottom of the flag.

THE TURKEY VULTURE

Can a turkey soar?

 

turkey vulture 3
Turkey Vulture Soaring

 WHAT IT IS

 

The National Bird and Mammal Institute in Ottawa, Ontario recently loaned the Ontario Ministry of Natural Resources and Forestry a trained turkey vulture for help in the sighting of forest fires.

The excellent eyesight of this bird makes it especially useful for night observations. The pictured turkey vulture is responsible for detecting two forest fires and one cabin fire in its first week of service.

Unfortunately the cabin fire destroyed the structure, but the two individuals occupying the cabin made it to safety.  Sapphire took this photo of the bird as it flew overhead.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

Every year the World Champion Kite Flying Contest is held near Louisbourg, Nova Scotia, Canada. This year, however, contestants from Ontario and Quebec threatened to boycott the event due to inconsistencies in the judging of the event.

Complaints have skyrocket in recent years, with kite flying clubs complaining that the aerial component of the events were not consistently judged.

To address these concerns,  the Board of Governors of the World Championship event has hired a trained turkey vulture to fly among the kites and render final judgements.

THE WATERFALL

THE WATERFALL

                                                              WHAT IT IS
My brother has loudly declared on many occasions his distrust of soothsayers but his bias towards science has caused him no end of problems as well. When an old gentleman from Tomiko Lake said he knew of a green frog that placed pebbles in the shape of constellations, Cricket had to see this himself.

Our ride along Hwy 64 was uneventful and when we arrived at our destination, the hunt for the green frog was on in earnest.

Unfortunately, Cricket never found the frog.  Instead, he slipped on some wet rocks and was swept down this fast-moving creek.  I took this photo just as Cricket popped up from beneath the water.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

As often as she can, Sapphire makes a pilgrimage to this waterfall to collect a few containers of water.  She uses this precious liquid to water a special rosebush given to her by a lady from Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania.

Sapphire claims that the water gives the rose a most robust quality and it even allows the pollinators to travel great distances.  In fact, it is said, pollinators of this rose may have been seen as far away as the Van Dusen Botanical Gardens in Vancouver, British Columbia.

 

Ellie’s story continues

October 2017 Entry

Ellie's story continues.JPG

We had spent a busy day in the city.  The monthly groceries, the medical appointments, the prescription pick-up at the drug store finally completed, Cricket and I were heading to our peaceful country home in Wanapitei.  Just before we got on our way, Cricket suggested we drop into the Sally Ann store…again…just in case.

To our surprise the store was buzzing with young men.  One of them pulled a stuffed giraffe loose from a box, and dangling it by the left leg, asked the cashier, “Hey lady, how much for this thing?”

Cricket noted the school colours and the school insignia on his jacket and whispered.  “Frat boys.”

“All the stuffed toys are one dollar,” the cashier responded.

“Hey, guys, these things are dirt cheap.  They’ll make great targets for paintball.”

Cricket eyed up the frat boys as they went through the store talking loudly and riffling through the boxes with reckless speed, throwing things around and wrecking carefully planned displays.  The cashier watched them from the corner of her eye.

I needed bedtime reading so I began looking through the books lined up on a shelf.  I pushed aside an outdated set of encyclopaedias to get at some novels.  One of the hard cover books fell on the floor with a loud thud, and as I bent to pick it up, I spotted her in a large blue plastic tote stuffed in among some things that might be useful to someone, but not to me.

“It’s Ellie,” I gasped, catching Cricket’s attention.  We hurriedly dug the teddy bear out from among the other items in the tote.  I hugged her.  I took her to the counter and put her gently on the counter.  I started rummaging through my purse for a dollar, and then I heard coins rolling on the counter.

“Hey guys I’ve got one here.  That’s it, let’s go.”

“I was buying her,” I said.

He shrugged.  “I got to it first, lady.  You snooze, you lose.”  He headed for the door and his waiting friends.  They began piling into a rusty sedan.

My brother Cricket is not the most athletic person but before I knew it he was heading off the frat boy, and just before the young man reached the car, he tackled him.  In the scuffle that ensued I was able to wrestle Ellie from her kidnapper.  Some of his friends came out of the car.  As he started cursing at us, I threw him some coins, double what he’d paid.  This seemed to pacify him, and he told his buddies to get going.

We drove to Wanapitei with Ellie on the seat between us.

 

THE COLLECTION

What is a fall collection and can you find yourself in a pile of it.

leaf collection 2.jpg

 WHAT IT IS

Sapphire informed Ellie that she was taking her to see a fall collection by Monsieur Lamouche.  Excited to attend a show displaying the latest in fashion, Ellie wore her fanciest hat.  The teddy bear managed to hide her disappointment when Sapphire showed her this leaf collection, one of many “fall” themed pieces at the art show.  The fly who had collected the leaves salvaged the day when he autographed Ellie’s program with the words, To the loveliest teddy bear.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

Because Sapphire and Cricket travel a lot, Cricket often finds himself confused as to where he is when he wakes up.  He claims it is not his fault that he often gets up “on the wrong side of the bed”.  He might find himself up against the wall or pointed entirely in the wrong direction.  One morning he woke up and found himself in the middle of a pile of leaves on the front lawn of a motel in Beaver Falls.  He scrambled out just as the city truck, equipped with a supersized vacuum, came along and sucked the leaves away.

THE CANINE UNIT

0B2A1594.CR2

WHAT IT IS

 

On a warm September afternoon Cricket and I found ourselves travelling along Commercial street heading toward the TD Garden to take in an exhibition game between the Boston Bruins and the Montreal Canadians.

 

As we drove along, a speeding silver mustang convertible, blue and red lights flashing, raced behind then beyond us. Cricket instinctively floored it and we followed the mustang for several blocks until it came to an abrupt stop along with several other police vehicles.

 

It seems a drug bust involving a new, elite canine unit and regular Boston police officers was about to take place. Sapphire took this photo of the head of this canine unit as he was relaxing in his mustang after a successful raid.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

 

CEO Hugh Grant of Monsanto has issued a directive to all senior executives that they must travel in company SUV’s and be guarded at all times by company security officials.

 

Particularly singled out was Vice President Dr. Micheal K. Stein whose chauffeured silver mustang convertible has been often seen racing around St. Louis, Missouri.

 

Pictured here is the now laid-off chauffeur Gus. Fortunately for Gus, he has recently secured employment in Oslo, Norway herding up a group of chipmunks for a national bank in that city.

 

 

THE RAIDS

                                                    

 

 

 

 

blog photo 21 fog.JPG    WHAT IT IS

 

The Federal Bureau of Investigation released this photo at a news conference held on the outskirts of Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania. According to local agents, a raid was conducted in an effort to round up some wanted ringleaders of an international insect syndicate.

 

Although the raid did not produce any arrests, a wasp, a bee and a dragonfly were seen fleeing the scene. The only item of significance found was a manifesto outlining the group’s intentions and a list of companies tied to the genetically modified seed industry.

WHAT IT IS NOT

 

Hidden among the bushes and trees are six security guards employed by the Handelsbanken in Oslo, Norway. The guards have been instructed to detain the three remaining chipmunks that the bank used in a failed customer relations project.

 

These munks were once used in an effort to help customers of the bank count their cash at the bank’s ATMs, but the project was shelved for a variety of reasons. Most of the munks have been shipped back to Canada, but the three remaining ones seem determined to continue to help their customers.