Tag: dark humor

THE TURKEY VULTURE

Can a turkey soar?

 

turkey vulture 3
Turkey Vulture Soaring

 WHAT IT IS

 

The National Bird and Mammal Institute in Ottawa, Ontario recently loaned the Ontario Ministry of Natural Resources and Forestry a trained turkey vulture for help in the sighting of forest fires.

The excellent eyesight of this bird makes it especially useful for night observations. The pictured turkey vulture is responsible for detecting two forest fires and one cabin fire in its first week of service.

Unfortunately the cabin fire destroyed the structure, but the two individuals occupying the cabin made it to safety.  Sapphire took this photo of the bird as it flew overhead.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

Every year the World Champion Kite Flying Contest is held near Louisbourg, Nova Scotia, Canada. This year, however, contestants from Ontario and Quebec threatened to boycott the event due to inconsistencies in the judging of the event.

Complaints have skyrocket in recent years, with kite flying clubs complaining that the aerial component of the events were not consistently judged.

To address these concerns,  the Board of Governors of the World Championship event has hired a trained turkey vulture to fly among the kites and render final judgements.

THE WATERFALL

THE WATERFALL

                                                              WHAT IT IS
My brother has loudly declared on many occasions his distrust of soothsayers but his bias towards science has caused him no end of problems as well. When an old gentleman from Tomiko Lake said he knew of a green frog that placed pebbles in the shape of constellations, Cricket had to see this himself.

Our ride along Hwy 64 was uneventful and when we arrived at our destination, the hunt for the green frog was on in earnest.

Unfortunately, Cricket never found the frog.  Instead, he slipped on some wet rocks and was swept down this fast-moving creek.  I took this photo just as Cricket popped up from beneath the water.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

As often as she can, Sapphire makes a pilgrimage to this waterfall to collect a few containers of water.  She uses this precious liquid to water a special rosebush given to her by a lady from Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania.

Sapphire claims that the water gives the rose a most robust quality and it even allows the pollinators to travel great distances.  In fact, it is said, pollinators of this rose may have been seen as far away as the Van Dusen Botanical Gardens in Vancouver, British Columbia.

 

THE FLYING DUCK

Why would a duck attack a drone or apply for a job in a ballet?

blog phoho 18 flying ducks.CR2.jpgWHAT IT IS

Cricket and I usually don’t find ourselves in South America, but on one occasion we were actually on a tour of Pablo Escobar’s compound in Medellin, Columbia. After the tour, we were relaxing on our hotel balcony when a drone appeared out of nowhere. As the drone was hovering in front of us, a duck smashed into the drone causing its destruction.

We later found out that twenty ducks are used by state run authorities to disrupt drug cartel drones, which they use for everything from communications to actual drug deliveries.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

A few weeks before the production was to open, Sapphire took this photo of an Ugly Duckling hopeful as he flew around St. James park in Toronto.

On his Facebook page this duck wrote, “Mildred Duck says I’m too cute for the Ugly Duckling … she’s right.”

THE DESERT

Camping alone is not the best idea.

 

blog photo 16 geavel pit.JPGWHAT IT IS

Cricket said his guide may have had mental health issues, he didn’t know. What he did know is that the guide just left him in the Gobi Desert to fend for himself.

Cricket had gone to the desert to photograph the wild onions that are used for food by the various creatures that inhabit the desert. Cricket used his SAT phone to contact his helicopter pilot and took this photo as they took off for Sainshand, Mongolia.

 

WHAT IT IS NOT

Cricket and I spend a lot of time together, but once a year on July 2nd, Cricket strikes out on his own for a couple days of solo camping in order to show off his independent streak.

He loads up the truck with all manner of camping equipment, camera gear and any supplies he thinks he may need. During one such outing, Cricket got a flat tire and because he left behind the jack, tire iron and spare tire in favour of “necessary gear”, he found himself in quite a pickle.

After scrambling up to the top of a gravel pit, he managed to get enough of a cell signal to call a tow truck. He took this photo as he waited for the truck to arrive.